I feel very fortunate to be able to get to know my grandchildren and enjoy their unique personalities. When it comes to giving gifts to them, I have found that they usually do not remember from one birthday or Christmas to the next what we gave to them. I have been trying to think of a gift that will last in their memories and be meaningful. It is very tempting to buy them expensive gifts so they think you are the greatest grandmother in the world. But, that only spoils them, and eventually they all expect it – because the word gets out really quick to brothers, sisters and even cousins. So what are we grandparents to do?
I have come to the conclusion that the best gift we can give our grandchildren is our time. Keeping in touch often and showing them the attention they may not get from their busy parents is important. I used to be better at this and need to get back in the habit of calling, messaging, using Facetime or Marco Polo (an app).
Pay attention and listen to their funny stories. Ask about their friends, school days and other experiences. Children say the funniest things and we don’t want to miss out.
I did not receive large monetary gifts from my grandparents, but I have something that, to me, is much more valuable. I have their written histories and pictures. My grandmothers wrote journals and even wrote their favorite sayings, poems, recipes, and songs. Through them I am somewhat familiar with their parents, brothers and sisters. I treasure these precious books and pictures, and I am trying to do the same for my grandchildren by keeping my own journal.
Another gift I think that is valuable is to teach them how to use money. By gifting them money for special occasions like birthdays and holidays, they will have the opportunity to learn how to use it wisely. My grandkids know that grandma is a thrifter. I shop at thrift shops and last Christmas I just laid it all out and let them choose what they wanted. I think they liked it (you would have to ask them for sure). It is better than getting them something they will never wear, use, or think about again. I have on occasion taken some of my grandchildren thrifting with me and they usually find something they like.
We can encourage our grandchildren to save up for future expenses they will have like college, a car, or their wedding. We can also advise them to spend it on something that they need instead of wasting it on something trivial. We can suggest that they save it up so that they can purchase a more expensive item that they really want. This teaches them about saving and managing their money. This summer we hired our grandson to mow our lawns. He has decided he wants to put together a computer and is saving up to buy each of the parts. He is well on his way to get his computer.
Finally, Grandparents can offer unconditional love to their grandchildren. The world can be a negative place. We can be the light that greets them every time we see them, gives them a hug, a compliment, and listens to them when they are low. We should make time to attend their activities as much as possible and plan playdates to spend quality time with them. I am not consistent in doing this with all of my grandchildren, but hope to get better. That is the reason we retired to Utah from Hawaii – to spend more time with my grandchildren. We don’t know how much longer we will have to be with them and influence them for good, so we should make use of the time we have left.
So, the best gifts that I feel we can give our grandchildren is time, our journal, money management help, and unconditional love. I’m sure there are many more, but I chose to focus on these four at this time.